Squashbuckler
A downloadable game
It is dark in the chapel, save for a razor of moonlight falling through stained glass.
The baronet grins. His lips peel back, exposing long teeth.
He is young. Has always been young. Will always be young.
And the reason for his unending youth lies on the bier before him.
A farmer, just a few years past middle age, as beautiful and robust as the fields, stirs from unconsciousness.
His blood will be like mulled wine on this cold night.
The baronet leans in, fangs parting, nostrils flaring with the heady scent of life, when suddenly the doors to the chapel slam open so forcefully that the stone walls shudder.
"Your nights are over, monster!" says a high, squeaky voice from the doorway.
The baronet looks down.
Bathed in the moonlight is a summer squash. It is carrying a rapier.
"Squashbuckler..." growls the baronet.
The summer squash raises its sword in salute, and then it lunges.
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You are a blade-wielding garden vegetable.
Sworn to serve no lord and no country, you roam the earth seeking one goal: the defeat of all vampires.
Squashbuckler is a 20 page dice-rolling TRPG---in an extremely literal way. Your opponents' Hit Points determine how many stacking blocks they set up. Your stats determine how many dice you have to knock them down.
Included in this core rule book is all the information you need to create your own Squashbuckler, instructions on how to play as the Vampire Master for a group of Squashbucklers, and a sample scenario: Betrayal In The House Of Our Gourd.
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Comments
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First off, this game is amazing. Secondly, it brought to mind a balance concern I'd never thought of before, because unlike 99.9% of pen and paper RPG it involves physically yeeting dice at things. Different kinds of dice have different ballistic properties! Most plastic d20 are going to behave similarly, but I feel like heavy duty metal ones like I've been privileged to own a few sets of would have considerably more force and momentum.
Every time I read "stacking blocks or dominoes" I mentally find-replaced that with just "standard dominoes", because "stacking blocks" outside of the specific context of Jenga (or I guess Dread) don't have any standardized shape or size.
Two final thoughts, A) is there any particular reason that losing is not possible and is vampire prison by default and that this game is 'play until you win'? I feel like generally speaking the possibility of a TPK/bad ending adds spice and savor and nothing about this gourd-based premise seems to me to clash with that.
B) have you thought about giving the boss vampires the ability to 'play goalie' against (a limited number of) the player's rolls (in a turn)? I feel like this could really spice things up and add excitement. Curious if you tried anything like this in playtesting.
Yep! There's definitely some ways to calibrate the game outside of its current ruleset.
Using different dice materials or dominoes/blocks will affect gameplay. Metal dice feel a little less controllable, but def strike with more force. You could maybe build an advantage/disadvantage mechanic around heavier and lighter dice.
The no-TPK rule is stylistic. It's not essential, although it loosely aligns with swashbuckling fiction.
Goalie rules I hadn't thought about, and might get tricky with metal dice, but could definitely add a level of counterplay to the game.
This is maybe the most fun I've ever had reading a game. The text is hilarious and plays up the game's silly tone. It's actually very inspiring from a game dev perspective - I want to be able to write game text like this someday! It's guaranteed to put a smile on your face.